groundviews » My Country of Contradictions

My Country of Contradictions

November 18, 2009 at 7:00 am · Categories: Colombo, Post-War, Reconciliation | by Electra

Some years ago, when I was younger, I could see where all the stereotypes about our island came from. I could see why people said Sri Lankans were particularly warm or friendly – they really were. I could see why Sri Lanka was known as an escape, a Shangri La for western tourists and foreigners – it truly was breathtakingly beautiful and pristine. I could see why people liked to live here – I liked it too. The people were nice, the pace was relaxed, and the atmosphere was that of an island.

Today, I find that I live in a country of contradictions. The colonial alongside the native. The beautiful co-existing with the horrific. The arrogant beside the hospitable. The humble alongside the aggressive. If you ask me today to tell you what Sri Lanka is like, or what Sri Lankans are like, I would have to reluctantly answer that I am no longer sure – that I can’t really explain.

Many worlds exist, side-by-side, rubbing shoulders, and yet carefully separate. Young people sip expensive cocktails in shiny nightclubs, go to movie screenings in garden cafés, and take weekends off to sun by the sea. Some go back and forth from air-conditioned office rooms to air-conditioned homes, in air-conditioned cars, of course – and with all this air-conditioning, it gets easier to forget that you live on a tropical island, where the sun blazes at you all day long. It becomes easy to forget that right outside your door, there is poverty, and easier to forget that a couple of hundred miles from where you live, are the consequences of a war – hundreds of thousands of people in camps, entire towns and villages bullet-holed, bombed, demolished and destroyed. It becomes easier to forget with time, and then all at once, it will be erased from your memory altogether. You will not pass this knowledge on to your children; it will never affect you again.

My generation particularly, suffers from this combination of not having been told, and having forgotten ourselves – that any world besides our own exists. We are not taught in schools, nor is this information easily available to us. Entire bits of Sri Lanka’s modern history are left out in our education, and therefore it never even enters our memories or becomes a part of our collective knowledge about our country. And the signs – the stories you hear, the memories that are recollected, the homeless on the streets, the Tamil boy in front of you is harassed at a checkpoint – all these signs become easier to ignore if they are not in context. They become easy to look away from. The people of these different worlds rarely ever cross paths. And yet, they need each other, in a funny way.

Such a country of contradictions I have never known. Sri Lankans are world-famous for their warmth and hospitality, – and yet, we have proven that when angered, when pushed into a corner, we can be violent, irrational and unstoppable in our hatred. We are well-known for our multi-ethnic, multi-cultural communities and tolerance – and yet, we have proven that we will allow our distrust, our paranoia, our nepotism, and our refusal to accept, to destroy everything. We could be a country abundant with prosperity – the natural resources are bountiful and plenty, the people are intelligent and skilled – and yet, we have proven that we would throw it all away for power and personal gain.

It all exists – carefully, just about touching each other but not really, these worlds. The turmoil, the rustling unease, the simmering tempers, the corruption and abuse, carefully standing quietly alongside the luxury, the bustle of jobs and coffees shared by friends, the lives untouched.

I have tried to know all these worlds. I have tried to look beyond my own, journey beyond what I was taught and not taught; I have tried to live a little each day in all these places and times. Because to me Sri Lanka is all these worlds. It is not one, without the other. It is not only the world of the poor; it is not just that of the rich. It is not the world of war, and it is not the world of unaffected peace. It is not merely the world of suffering and pain, and it is also not solely the world of blissful ignorance. It is all of these things, and every little thing in-between. To me, the country of Sri Lanka hangs in the balance of where these worlds meet – the fine line on which these worlds cross and collide, the method with which these worlds exist together.

That is the Sri Lanka I know and live in – and love. And it is the Sri Lanka I wish everyone would get to know.

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Sugath Ekanayake said,

November 18, 2009 @ 9:57 am

Very sensitive article. I too have same sadness in my mind. I had a chance to live my childhood in aenvoirment where you explained in your article. We had no barries we were free to go anywhere and play with others etc.Beacause my parent did not have any fear as envoirment was so good people were so friendly and helpful.
Now I treat my chidren completely opposite way my parents treated me. I have to accompany them to school, private clases and whereever they go. What more we can do it is our duty to protect them as society we live now is so wild.

I am so sad about my children and afraid when I think about future socity which they have to live. Still I dream about my child hood.

Ananda said,

November 18, 2009 @ 11:41 am

“Young people sip expensive cocktails in shiny nightclubs, go to movie screenings in garden cafés, and take weekends off to sun by the sea.”

That line is unintentionally revealing of the author’s own pursuits, is it not?

Idealist? said,

November 18, 2009 @ 2:30 pm

Thank you… yes, it always beats me how, on an individual level people are friendly, warm, hospitable, even peaceable, and how there could be such a raging war and war mentality on a collective level!!! A country of contradictions indeed!

Sohan Bones said,

November 18, 2009 @ 5:56 pm

@ Ananda:
“Young people sip expensive cocktails in shiny nightclubs, go to movie screenings in garden cafés, and take weekends off to sun by the sea.”
That line is unintentionally revealing of the author’s own pursuits, is it not?

I’m not sure I see Ananda’s point. Does Ananda mean that this reveals that the author is one such young person engaged in such pursuits? If so, I don’t see how that matters, because I don’t think such pursuits are wrong in themselves as long as one one can financially afford them, and as long as one engages in them only responsibly and moderately and also as long as one also gives equal time and resources (read “money”, among other resources) to the “less fortunate” (and, disclosure: I am not saying that to defend myself; no, because I have chosen to not engage in such pursuits even although financially I can well afford to).

Or does Ananda mean that the author has a “sour grapes” attitude towards such pursuits, either because the author cannot afford these, or because she is what some people would categorize as prudish or old fashioned or something? For myself, I certainly read nothing between the lines that indicates any such sour grapes attitude. And I see that it is certainly true that many – though not all – people do in fact engage almost exclusively in such a lifestyle and are conveniently and selfishly and intentionally ignorant of the harsh realities of the rest of today’s Sri Lanka. I really don’t see anything wrong in the author’s slant or anything like that.

As for Electra:
I too feel much as you do: it is just nightmarish to see what’s happening to the country: and I don’t mean the external tangible things such as war and poverty and disasters and so on, but more than that I mean this entire widespread selfish attitude where people are living in – largely intentionally chosen – obliviousness (I can’t make up a better word) to the “any worlds other than our own”. “A land like no other” takes on new meaning, sometimes.

Realist of Sri lanka said,

November 19, 2009 @ 10:03 am

I feel very sorry about our motherland. We all love our country as President does.but it is ruined by pity politicains including tamils. We have freed 60 years ago what we have achieved nothing still everybody is trying to kill each other for politics but they had never thought about our Loving country and its developent. see what is happenning now. Never never we relise this .

Mike Keller said,

November 19, 2009 @ 11:37 am

I truely believe that all people are good and loving, in some areas of society we just rush along to fast in life and forget to slow down and love or hug! I loved the story.
Have fun,
Mike Keller
author
http://www.lifeinaweek.com

niranjan said,

November 20, 2009 @ 11:51 am

Electra,

“Today, I find that I live in a country of contradictions. The colonial alongside the native.”-
The colonial buildings have survived, but the people remain native, feudal and tribal. There are contradictions in society but they are more to do with Sinhala, Tamil, Muslim, Burgher than colonial. There is very little that remains from the colonial times except for the buildings. Some of them are falling apart like the old Dutch Hospital building in Galle Fort.

Electra said,

November 23, 2009 @ 2:46 pm

Not so unintentional, Ananda.

Of course I meant to reveal a bit of the life I know, the life I live. And of course, this is precisely what I was talking about – that as pretentious or surreal or whatever a particular world or lifestyle may seem to someone, it exists in Sri Lanka. It is a part of this country, too. So, shiny nightclubs and pricey cocktails are a part of this country, too.

And I was trying to address my generation in particular I think – especially those in the middle or upper social classes. It is very easy to get lost in an insular little bubble for most kids, and it is not entirely their fault that they are oblivious to any world outside of that bubble. I struggled with this ignorance of my generation my whole school life, only now am I able to see that it is not their fault alone – and that, as I stated, our educational system, our parents too, are to blame, if that’s the word to use. But, having said that, I have also found that, in the same way that makes it easy to get lost, it’s also not that hard to find all the other worlds – they’re all right there, and Sri Lanka is very small, in every way. These other worlds that are not entirely our own are never that difficult to come across, or experience, the stories are never too far down the line – if you know where to look, and if you want to find it.

Electra said,

November 23, 2009 @ 2:48 pm

Niranjan – I think you will find that there is a lot more than still remains colonial in Sri Lanka than just the buildings – particularly in areas like Galle. It’s in the food, of course in the architecture – the colonizations have left residue in our languages, our attitudes, our persona as a nation – and of course I think you will find many people from a generation that is distinctly colonial, in both habit and actions.

Heshan said,

November 24, 2009 @ 1:31 am

“The colonial buildings have survived, but the people remain native, feudal and tribal.”

That is very true. People complain about the colonials having plundered the wealth of the island… and yet the way that the rich (Sri Lankans) down upon the poorer ones!

niranjan said,

November 24, 2009 @ 9:00 am

Electra,

“I think you will find that there is a lot more than still remains colonial in Sri Lanka than just the buildings – particularly in areas like Galle. It’s in the food, of course in the architecture – the colonizations have left residue in our languages, our attitudes, our persona as a nation – and of course I think you will find many people from a generation that is distinctly colonial, in both habit and actions.”-

I agree with you on the above. However, most colonial era people are now dead. You still get a few stragglers left though.

rajivmw said,

November 25, 2009 @ 2:04 am

Elektra,

“If you ask me today to tell you what Sri Lanka is like, or what Sri Lankans are like, I would have to reluctantly answer that I am no longer sure – that I can’t really explain.”

I think Sri Lanka is not that difficult to figure out if you recognize it for what it is – still a largely rural peasant society. Such folk are, in general, warm-hearted, friendly, hospitable and guileless. Yet at the same time, they are fiercely tribal, resistant to change, and can be roused into a terrible fury. These are pretty universal characteristics – as anyone familiar with Asterix would know!

Of course, there’s more to it than that. We are caught in the middle of some fairly profound transitions. From rural to urban, from feudal to industrial, from English to vernacular (and perhaps back to English), from collectivist to individual, from statist to capitalist, etc., etc. The war stalled some of these processes midstream, leaving us with the confusion and contradiction that you talk about.

What we haven’t had for many centuries, and arguably still don’t, is the progressive influence of a Big City. For all their faults, it is in the cities where new ideas gain currency, ambitions are nurtured, creative energies are unleashed, and personal liberty becomes a value.

Colombo might have played such a role, but the conflict severely stunted its economic and intellectual growth, and nipped its budding cosmopolitanism. So it remains, for all its traffic jams, little more than an overgrown village. Or perhaps more accurately, an uneasy agglomeration of villages that has never quite transcended the sum of its parts.

But the war is over, and as the hysteria subsides, the machinery of change will splutter to life again. I’m optimistic that the national character will gradually become more liberal, rational and inclusive, even though the current portents may seem less than encouraging.

niranjan said,

November 25, 2009 @ 11:56 am

Rajivamw,

I agree with you on the comments you have made. However, it is doubtful whether the national character will gradually become more liberal, rational in the years to come simply because anti-liberal tendencies cannot be easily rolled back in a largely feudal/rural society with one main urban center.
If you look at our political culture the Presidential elections have thrown up two candidates who are not of a liberal disposition.

kalu said,

November 27, 2009 @ 11:14 pm

this is a well meaning well written article from young blood in Lanka. to survive and encourage others to follow in the pursuit of happiness and hope under the outrageous conditions of current Sri Lankan society is a commendable strength.

SomewhatDisgusted said,

December 2, 2009 @ 8:13 pm

Dear Rajivmw,

“I think Sri Lanka is not that difficult to figure out if you recognize it for what it is – still a largely rural peasant society. Such folk are, in general, warm-hearted, friendly, hospitable and guileless. Yet at the same time, they are fiercely tribal, resistant to change, and can be roused into a terrible fury. These are pretty universal characteristics – as anyone familiar with Asterix would know!”

What a delightful way to put it!

The only thing I can’t quite fathom is, the similar tribalism espoused by the more educated strata, both Sinhalese and Tamil. How is one to understand this fascination with Eelam/racial devolution and “Sri Lanka belongs to the Sinhalese” kind of mentalities, other than as tribalism also?

lankathilaka said,

December 6, 2009 @ 8:29 am

I assume that those involved ion discussion above are generally privileged,liberal and young – perfectly placed to observe but not to resolve.And I would think that all this confusion and contradiction is about par for the course….
And there are many kinds of colonialisms,some types of which you are not supposed to know that you in fact subscribe to,it’s not just buildings or food…
And things change all the time,they must,they will.
Everyone knows that some mountain tops were once beneath the sea,that great deserts were once woodland and glaciers covered half the earth.So does it make sense to panic and look around frantically for someone to blame when the sea level goes up a couple of inches? And there would be no computers or internet if there never had been polluting coal power,not even radio…
Cheer up,let’s hope for the best.

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